The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing ONE letter, and supply a new definition.
Here are some of this year's winners:
1. Cashtration: The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.
4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
5. Bozone: The substance surrounding stupid people, that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
I tried a few myself. Here is what I came up with:
Contempo: The rate of speed at which disapproval turns to disgust.
Contamidation: The simultaneous act of polluting one’s body and being damned to eternal punishment for it.
Bumbilical: When two people become awkwardly joined together.
Conformite: A person of small mind who acts in accordance with prevailing social values. They can live in great numbers, infesting a community.